Episode 2: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002)

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. Directed by Chris Columbus. Warner Bros., 2002.

Pre-Screening Sips

  • We begin with a confession: Chamber of Secrets has always been my favorite of the movies. I know, I know, it’s probably your least favorite, but I adore the introduction of the darker tone (before things get too bleak) and all the creatures!

Post-Screening Snippets

  • I know people love Dobby, and I do like his little phrases, but he is just too wrinkly for comfort
  • The first, and most important, genius decision of the film is the increased use of Julie Walters as Mrs. Weasley
  • The second, and most tantalizing, genius decision of the film is the introduction of Jason Isaacs’s luscious-haired Lucius Malfoy
  • This movie has a sense of sheer silliness that the others don’t have, which really works in a movie filled with academic wizards who shoot beams from sticks
  • Hagrid comforting Hermione after Draco calls her a “mudblood” gives me the feels
  • Why is Professor Lockhart here? Why would he be hired? Why did I also have an action figure of this man?
  • The most unrealistic part of this movie Is when the rogue bludger flies through all of the stands at the Quidditch stadium and no one is concerned about the structural integrity of their seats
  • The little spin-and-snap Snape does to pull Malfoy up to the dueling stage is the level of fabulous I aim to be as a professor
  • “I didn’t know you could read” is still one of the funniest lines in the series
  • Remember when we all discovered the actress who played Moaning Myrtle was in her thirties and our minds were blown?
  • The only place someone named “Minister Fudge” should be allowed to work is Wonka Factory
  • The spider’s den sequence is one of my favorites in the whole series; it earns extra points for the mix of practical and digital effects
  • Tom Riddle playing magic Scrabble with his name is the most unintentionally funny bit of the movie
  • The Basilisk is one of my all-time favorite movie monsters, right up there with the Creature from the Black Lagoon and Courteney Cox’s bangs in Scream 3

The Final Potion

         Harry Potter and the Creepy Crawley Critters is generally considered one of the lesser entries in the franchise, but it’s secretly one of the best! Part two mixes equal parts whimsy, absurdity, and danger together in its cauldron.

GRADE: A

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